Confession time. After my divorce my writing productivity suffered.
Ha ha ha. That’s actual a huge understatement. After my ex left me for another my writing ground to a complete halt. In fairness, feeling sorry for myself, random weeping, and plotting elaborate fantasies where he would realize what a huge mistake he’d make and beg me to come back as I stood there looking amazing and refusing, took up a lot of my time. Plus, stress eating, those Oreos weren’t going to take care of themselves.
Then there was a global pandemic that shut down the world and worrying about if I would run out of toilet paper and/or die consumed a fair bit of time as well, not leaving a lot left over for creativity.
This lack of writing bothered me.
Understatement. I defined myself in part by being a writer. If I was a writer who didn’t write, what did that make me? Not to mention I teach writing so there was this aspect of feeling like a liar. Then we can round out the problem that I earn my living as a writer and the price of toilet paper was going up.
Every time I tried to go back to my previous work habits I’d fail. Then I’d feel like a loser. Repeat.
What broke me out of this cycle was the idea of rethinking productivity. What if I didn’t measure my worth as a creative person by the number of words I got down on the page, but instead by using my time for creative pursuits? This could include drawing, reading, looking at art, listening to music, talking about story etc. I saw creative productivity not just as an outcome, but also something that I input.
Mind blown.
I decided to set the bar low. Ridiculously low, I would aim to write 200 words a day for five days a week. Given that I used to write 2000 words a day five days a week it seemed almost laughable, but it did feel do-able. So, I did it. I wrote a book that really wasn’t that good, put it aside and have been writing something new. I’m up to 500 words a day 6 days a week. I can feel the groove coming back. I’m ENJOYING writing again.
If you’re struggling with productivity, maybe it’s time to rethink your definition of success. Perhaps you’re in a period of your life where you need to focus on inputting creative energy not on the output. Refill that well. Enjoy the process again.